joke. The results are described in his book, Quirkology. Here are the first Q. What did the English policeman say when he came home and found his wife. A Project of The Internet TESL Journal. Teachers often use jokes in the ESL/EFL classroom to teach culture, grammar and vocabulary. If you know a joke that works well with ESL/EFL students, please submit the joke. joke book, he often encounters periods of depression and a slowing of motiva- tion. During periods of depression, I was spurred on by an important quote.

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ENGLISH JOKES. I PART. A Talking Frog. An older gentleman was playing a round of golf. Suddenly his ball sliced and landed in a shallow pond. As he. Jokes and riddles offer a great segue into multiple word meanings, homophones, language The kid-friendly jokes in this book are great for classroom (or. By:kr. Jokes. CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD - 44 Pages (kb - PDF format) . We're looking for amazing English teachers to join us in Jakarta, Lippo.

Is it used in a different way?

How to Learn English with Jokes

Comedian Summer Ray and Jen Doll have great one-liner jokes that use observations about life to make funny comments. You can sometimes find puns in comment sections of many websites. Anecdote An anecdote is a short story about something that really happened to you or someone you know. Find it online: You can find anecdotes on any website where people share stories about their lives. Facebook , Tumblr and other blog websites like WordPress are full of people sharing anecdotes about their lives.

Non Sequitur This is an especially fun type of joke because it uses nonsense! Some memes use non sequiturs be warned that some memes use crude language!

You can find non sequiturs in memes like this one. You can find other memes on Know Your Meme again, watch out for the language.

Category: Jokes & Riddles

Parody A parody makes fun of something by copying it in a funny way. Comedian Weird Al Yankovic creates parodies of songs by using the same music but changing the words. Understanding a parody usually requires knowing the original. Twitter has many parody accounts as well, where people pretend to be fictional or famous people like this fake account of Mark Zuckerberg the creator of Facebook.

Do you believe in God? Goldfish 2: Of course, I do! Who do you think changes the water?

english jokes.pdf

Dad, what is an idiot? An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can't understand him. Do you understand me?

I could go to the end of the world for you. Yes, but would you stay there? I offer you myself. I am sorry I never accept cheap gifts. I want to share everything with you. Let's start from your bank account. Submitted by kara dolson Teacher: Why are you late? There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill.

That's nice. Were you helping him look for it? I was standing on it. Submitted by Fred G. Stone Customer: Excuse me, but I saw your thumb in my soup when you were carrying it. Oh, that's okay. The soup isn't hot. Submitted by Jim Sperling The real estate agent says, "I have a good, cheap apartment for you. How do you like the money?

English Student: I like it very much.

I would like to have a plate of rice and a piece of fried chicken and a cup of coffee Waitress: Is it enough Sir? Do you think I can't download more? Do you know the way to the zoo? Do you have trouble making decisions? Three mice are being chased by a cat. The mice were cornered when one of the mice turned around and barked, "Ruff!

Later when the mice told their mother what happened, she smiled and said, "You see, it pays to be bilingual! One day they decided to go on a picnic. When they got there, they realized they had forgotten the soda.

The youngest turtle said he would go home and get it if they wouldn't eat the sandwiches until he got back. A week went by, then a month, finally a year, when the two turtles said,"oh, come on, let's eat the sandwiches. Conjugate the verb "to walk" in simple present. The student: I walk. You walk The teacher intruptes him: Quicker please. I run. You run Mouhssin Father: What did you do today to help your mother?

I dried the dishes Daughter: And I helped pick up the pieces. Stone A: Look at your face I know what you had for breakfast B: What was it? No, that was yesterday. Janekt Ho A: Why are all those people running? They are running a race to get a cup. Who will get the cup?

The person who wins.

Then why are all the others running? Girish Chavan Patient: Doctor, I think that I've been bitten by a vampire. Drink this glass of water. Will it make me better? No, I but I'll be able to see if your neck leaks. Rizwana Lahore Pakistan Said to a railroad engineer: What's the use of having a train schedule if the trains are always late.

The reply from the railroad engineer: How would we know they were late, if we didn't have a schedule? Submitted by Kyle Jefferson A: When I stand on my head the blood rushes to my head, but when I stand on my feet the blood doesn't rush to my feet.

Why is this? It's because your feet aren't empty. Submitted by Kyle Jefferson Teacher: Did your father help your with your homework? No, he did it all by himself. What are some products of the West Indies? I don't know. Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?

10000 Jokes,toasts And Stories

We borrow it from our neighbor. On a crowded bus, one man noticed that another man had his eyes closed. Are you sick? It's just that I hate to see old ladies standing.

Submitted by lisbeth A: Do you want to hear a dirty joke? A white horse fell in the mud. Submitted by Robert Kenneth Peter Kroeker - age 21 A nervous old lady on a bus was made even more nervous by the fact that the driver periodically took his arm out of the window. When she couldn't stand it any longer, she tapped him on the shoulder and whispered on his ear: I'll tell you when it's raining!

Submitted by Joan M. Diez Cliville I used to be a werewoolf But I'm much better noooooooooooow! He's wearing shorts, sunglasses, a towel and listening to music on his walkman.

He's having a good time. Suddenly he sees a caravan approaching. He stops the Arabs and ask them cheerfully: Waiter, waiter!

There is a frog in my soup!!! Sorry, sir. The fly is on vacation. Submitted by Daniel Fernando Rodrigues One teacher said this to his students before the final test. God said to man So that you will love them. Man said to God But why did you make them so dumb?

God said to man So that they will love you. Submitted by Esmond Jones. Knock Knock Who's there? Olive who? Olive you so much! I love you so much.. Submitted by Barbara S. Knock, knock.You have dancing shoes With nimble soles: I have a soul of lead So stakes me to the ground I cannot move. In this regard, as stated by Lems , texting puns are created every day for more economical ways to convey messages, and they have also been a part of the lives of EFL learners in various countries around the world.

Squares Between Groups Yes, but would you stay there?

An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can't understand him. Do you understand me? I would therefore suggest the following alternative: This minimal awareness may divert their attention away from the punch-line of the joke, leading to a misunderstanding or delayed understanding of it.

RUSSEL from Chicago
I relish reading comics unabashedly. Also read my other articles. I have a variety of hobbies, like music.